Speed dating, or builder interviewing?

All the paperwork got recorded today, so we officially own two homes.  Wow!

Now, I have to figure out what to look for in a builder.  I know some things to ask, but I think we still worry that we will make a poor choice.  I've heard so many horror stories!  Exactly why I said I would never build.  But, here we are. 

I'm assuming that looking for a builder is similar to looking for a husband.  Someone honest, hard-working, trustworthy.  All good traits, for sure.  It seems a bit like speed-dating though.  Well, at least I'm guessing, as I've never actually tried speed-dating.  (Stay with me, I realize this is an odd metaphor...)  Really, you're looking for the perfect person and can only go by what they choose to tell you.  Obviously, a builder will have some references, but it seems like you're going to have a gut feeling in the first few minutes. 

Thankfully, Mark will be at the meetings with me.  I think a lot of times, I trust his gut more than my own.  Many of the choices we make for the house are researched mainly by me.  At least this time, if it goes awry, I can share the blame.  One of the many benefits of being married.  That, and not having to actually try speed-dating.